Fortunately, there’s no business like show business
IRON MOUNTAIN – Some of my most unforgettable moments have been onstage or backstage of a play. After years of experience with school and community productions, I have learned that the play must go on even when the actors are still in the bathroom when the curtain comes up.
That is one example of what happened during the high school shows I directed. Anyone acquainted with teenage girls knows that they are ready when they are ready and not a moment before. Such was the case when one of my actresses failed to enter on cue: she was drying her freshly polished nails under the hand dryer in the bathroom. Another missed entrance was even more haunting literally. The play was a ghost story, and I gave a boy a small, non-speaking role which only required him to show his face in a window, scowl, and disappear. Well, he disappeared all right: during the intermission he decided he was going home and refused to re-appear in the second act. In desperation I substituted one of the stage hands, whose cameo appearance in the window created even more mystery for the perplexed audience.
Blunders are not limited to youngsters, as illustrated by an older woman cast as the housekeeper in a community theatre whodunit. Suddenly confused in the opening act, she prematurely opened a closet door, exposing a stage dummy intended to be revealed at the end of the play. The cast, a drawing room full of suspects, pretended that they hadn’t seen the corpse, but there was little surprise for the audience when the closet was opened again later (“Aha!?”)
Actors aren’t the only unpredictable elements in live theater. Props and scenery can also be unreliable. In a school production I directed, a plastic rat was rigged with string so it could appear to “run” across the stage. Although it worked during rehearsal, the scene brought a wave of laughter at our first performance. The plastic rodent had flipped up-side-down and was moving backwards, feet up, as a frantic crew member dragged it across the stage.
One of the funniest stage bloopers occurred when I was in a production of Arthur Miller’s “All My Sons.” At the end of the play, a main character commits suicide by shooting himself. A loud gunshot is heard and an actor comes on stage and informs the family of the sad news. But in one performance the prop gun would not go off backstage. Finally, the flustered actor made a hasty entrance but altered his line to say that the man had died by hanging himself. No sooner had he delivered these words and the prop gun went off backstage. The stunned cast froze. The actor then quickly added, “And then he shot himself.”
Sunday: Father’s Day coffee social, 10 a.m.; Protestant services, 2:15 p.m.; Pokereno, 3 p.m.
Monday: Fact or Fiction, 10 a.m.; Bowling, 2 p.m.; Ice cream, 3 p.m.; Bingo, 6:30 p.m.
Tuesday: Uno, 10 a.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.; Gardening on the patio, 3 p.m.
Wednesday: Room visits, 10 a.m.; Rosary, 11 a.m.; Music by the Golden Throats, 2 p.m.
Thursday: Bible study, 10 a.m.; Pokereno, 2 p.m.; Sit and Be Fit, 3 p.m.
Friday: Coffee and Pamper and Polish Nails, 10 a.m.; Mass with Father Mike, 2 p.m.; Happy hour, 3 p.m.
Saturday: Mingle and munch coffee social, 10 a.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.; Brainteasers Trivia, 3 p.m.
Golden Living Center
Sunday: Bingo, 10 a.m.; Baptist service with Pastor Aaron Miller, 2:30 p.m.
Monday: Resident council and menu committee meeting, 10 a.m.; Sensations, 11 a.m.; Grill hamburgers, 2 p.m.
Tuesday: Short stories, 10 a.m.; Music by Tom Palmer, 2 p.m.; Pretty Nails, 2 p.m.; Bingo with Trudi, 7 p.m.
Wednesday: Bingo, 9:45 a.m.; One to one visits, 1 p.m.; Play Wii, 2 p.m.
Thursday: Coupon cutters, 10 a.m.; Sensations, 11 a.m.; Cards, 2 p.m.; Bingo with Bette, 7 p.m.
Friday: Communion, 10 a.m.; Fitnessize, 11 a.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.; Music by Kay and Don, 3:30 p.m.
Saturday: Bingo, 10 a.m.; Music by Rick, 2 p.m.
Sunday: Easy Listening music and movie, 10:30 a.m.; Church services, 2:30 p.m.; Visitation and Reminisce, 3 p.m.; Card Club and Sit and Be Fit, 3:30 p.m.
Monday: Pet therapy with Kathy and Toby, 9:30 a.m.; Trivia, 10:30 a.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.; Social hour and Card Club, 3 p.m.; Sit and Be Fit and movie, 3:30 p.m.
Tuesday: Reading and Reminisce group, 10:30 a.m.; Jackpot, 2 p.m.; Social hour and Card Club, 3 p.m.; Aroma therapy and movie, 3:30 p.m.
Wednesday: Rosary group with Margaret, 10:30 a.m.; Catholic Mass, communion and visitation, 2 p.m.; Social hour and Card Club, 3 p.m.; Sit and Be Fit and movie, 3:30 p.m.
Thursday: Sit and Be Fit, 10:30 a.m.; Music by Jim Edberg, 2 p.m.; Social hour and Card Club, 3 p.m.; Activity cart and movie, 3:30 p.m.
Friday: Music, movie and activity cart, 10:30 a.m.; Golden K Bingo, 2 p.m.; Social hour and Card Club, 3 p.m.; Sit and Be Fit and movie, 3:30 p.m.
Saturday: Reading and reminisce group, 10:30 a.m.; Birthday party with music, 2 p.m.; Social hour and Card Club, 3 p.m.; Aroma therapy and movie, 3:30 p.m.
Sunday: Trivia Tidbits, 10 a.m.; One to one church visitors, 8:30 a.m. to 11 a.m.; Room visits, 9 a.m. to 11 a.m.; Afternoon matinee with popcorn, 1:30 p.m.
Monday: Crafts, 9 a.m. to 10:30 a.m.; Exercise, 11 a.m.; Garden Club, 12:45 p.m.; Room visits, 1 p.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.
Tuesday: CF Library, 9:30 a.m.; Book Club, 10 a.m.; Prayer, 10 a.m.; Wildlife film, 1:30 p.m.; Current events, 2 p.m.; Sunshine Club, 2:30 p.m.; Bonfire, 5:45 p.m.
Wednesday: Picnic to Ottawa, 10:30 a.m.; Travel Club, 10 a.m.; Exercise, 11 a.m.; Apostolic Lutheran Church, 1:15 p.m.; Night bingo, 6 p.m.; Visiting pets, 8 a.m. to 4 p.m.
Thursday: Puzzler, 9:30 a.m.; Bowling, 10 a.m.; Travel film, 1:30 p.m.; United Lutheran Church, 2 p.m.; Visiting pets, 8 a.m. to 4 p.m.; Happy hour, 2:30 p.m.
Friday: Crafts, 9 a.m. to 10:30 a.m.; Exercise, 11 a.m.; Room visits, 1 p.m.; Fiesta, 2 p.m.; Western movie, 6 p.m.
Saturday: Puzzler and Name That Word, 10 a.m.; Geri-Gym, 11 a.m.; Intergenerational social hour, 2 p.m.
Gathering place, 11:40 a.m. (daily), 4:30 p.m. (Monday through Friday).
Protestant Church service, Sunday, 3 p.m.
Games, 10:15 a.m. (Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday), 5:45 p.m. (Monday through Thursday).
Exercises, 10 a.m. (Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Saturday).
Sunday: Father’s Day social, 9:30 a.m.; Morsels and More, 1:30 p.m.
Monday: Wet Your Whistle, 9:30 a.m.; Did You Know, 10:15 a.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.; Wii Bowling, 5:45 p.m.
Tuesday: Wet Your Whistle, 9:30 a.m.; Pet visits with Toby, 10:15 a.m.; Resident council and food committee, 2 p.m.; Movie and a manicure, 5:45 p.m.
Wednesday: Wet Your Whistle, 9:30 a.m.; Card Shark Bingo, 10:15 a.m.; Monthly birthday party with George Hirn and Friends, 2 p.m.; Card Club, 5:45 p.m.
Thursday: Wet Your Whistle, 9:30 a.m.: Pet visits with Hannah, 10 a.m.; Vocab is Fab, 10:15 a.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.; Karaoke, 5:45 p.m.
Friday: Wet Your Whistle, 9:30 a.m.; It’s Trivial, 10:15 a.m.; Catholic Mass, 2 p.m.; Chips and Chatter, 2:30 p.m.
Saturday: Wet Your Whistle, 9:30 a..; Current events, 10:15 a.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.
Rosary Sunday through Friday, 8:30 a.m.
Communion service Monday through Friday, 9 a.m.
Coffee social every day at 9:45 a.m.
Pet visits throughout the week.
Sunday: Free breakfast for all tenants, 8 a.m. to 9 a.m.; Suomikutsuu-Finnish music on Channel 6, 9:30 a.m.; Social hour with coffee and snacks, 2:30 p.m.; Oldies but Goodies movie matinee, 3 p.m.
Monday: Smear card game, 10 a.m.; Exercise, 11:15 a.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.; Bible study, 6 p.m.; Movie night, 6:30 p.m.
Tuesday: Catholic Mass service, 10 a.m.; Bowling, 10:30 a.m.; Tenant choice lunch from Kentucky Fried Chicken, 12 p.m.
Wednesday: Card and stamp store, 10:30 a.m.; Exercise, 11:15 a.m.; Jubilee shopping trip, 2 p.m.; Night bingo, 6 p.m.
Thursday: United Lutheran Church service, 2 p.m.; Wine and cheese party on the front porch, 6 p.m.
Friday: Exercise, 11:15 a.m.; Father’s Day party at Medicare with snacks and live music, 2 p.m.; Happy hour, 4 p.m.
Saturday: Social hour, 2 p.m.; Bingo, 2 p.m.; Trivia, 5:30 p.m.; Lawrence Welk Show on PBS, 8 p.m.
Exercise, Monday through Friday at 11 a.m.
Juice time, daily at 10 a.m.
Shopping days: Tuesdays, 10 a.m. and Fridays, 1 p.m.
Sunday: Bible study, 2:30 p.m.; Refreshments, 3 p.m.
Monday: Bingo, 2 p.m.; Refreshments, 3 p.m.
Tuesday: Music with Verna, 2 p.m.; Refreshments, 3 p.m.
Wednesday: Bingo, 2 p.m.; Refreshments, 3 p.m.
Thursday: Crossroads, 2 p.m.; Rosary, 3 p.m.
Friday: Birthday party, 2 p.m.
Saturday: Movie and popcorn, 2 p.m.
Note: All centers ask for 24 hour advanced reservations for lunch. If you have meals delivered and will not be home, notify the center.
Meal every Monday and Thursday at noon. Reservations requested 24 hours in advance.
Open Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.
Lunch at noon.
Bingo on Tuesdays.
Craft time on Wednesdays after the meal. Ladies: bring your craft to work on.
Free meal drawing on Thursdays.
Meals: Monday through Friday.
Cards and games available 9 a.m. to noon and 1 p.m. to 2 p.m.
Hostess on duty Monday through Friday.
Treats and coffee, 8:30 a.m. through noon.
Tuesdays, Craft class at 8:30 a.m. to noon.
Birthday party, every third Tuesday.
Crystal Falls Center
Head Cook, Donna Sjoquist
Meals: Monday and Tuesday, noon. Wednesday meal is salad bar, 4:30 p.m. and dinner, 5 p.m. Suggested donation is $4. Center is closed Thursday through Sunday. The first Sunday of each month is a card party from 1 p.m. to 3 p.m. ($3 for cards of choice and lunch). Potluck dinner and cribbage on the second Saturday of each month at 5:30 p.m. ($2 for cribbage). A site council meeting on third Wednesday at 3 p.m. For members, a potluck lunch at noon on the third Thursday of each month with bingo afterwards. Blood pressure taken by request anytime the center is open.
Crystal Lake Center
Monday: Casino bus, 9 a.m. (through April); Woodcarvers, 10:30 a.m.
Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday: Cards.
Dances are held every second and fourth Friday of the month at 7 p.m.
Spinning Spools Quilters Guild meets Wednesdays, 1 p.m. to 4 p.m. Crafters, scrap bookers, etc. also welcome.
Director: Norma Dixon
Meals served Monday through Thursday at 11:15 a.m.
Bingo on the first and third Wednesday of each month after lunch.
Congregate jigsaw puzzle done daily.
Fence Center/Town Hall
Meal at noon on Wednesdays only. Reservations requested 48 hours in advance.
Florence Community Center/Town Hall
Meal at 11:30 a.m. Monday through Friday.
Social hour, 10:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m., Monday through Friday. Jigsaw puzzles, cards, cribbage, board games, and recreational bingo. The coffee is always on.
Aging and Disability Resource Center of Florence County
Monday through Friday, 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m.
Hillcrest Senior Dining Center, Aurora
Meal at 11:30 a.m. on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. Reservations requested 48 hours in advance. Social hour from 10:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays. Jigsaw puzzles, cards, cribbage, board games and recreational bingo. The coffee is always on. Walk Fit offered free on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays from 8 a.m. to 11 a.m. Call (715) 589-2768 for information.
Meal is Monday through Friday at noon. Suggested donation is $3.
Bus goes to Norway the first Monday of the month for dinner. Check with center for time and cost.
Tuesday: Bingo, 12:30 p.m.
Wednesday: Movie Day once a month.
Thursday: Rides to Escanaba.
Friday: Bingo, 12:30 p.m.
Iron River Center
Directors: Katherine Bortolameolli and Brian Kassa
Meals served Monday through Thursday from 11:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.; $4 (over 60) and $5 (under 60).
Evening meal on Thursdays with salad bar at 4 p.m. and dinner at 4:30 p.m.
Bingo is on Tuesdays and Wednesdays at 1:15 p.m.
Cards are played on Thursdays, 1 p.m.
Bus trip to Iron Mountain is on the third Wednesday of the month.
Dance on the second Saturday of the month from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. Cover charge is $5.
Pancake Day on the third Saturday of the month, 8 a.m. to 11:30 a.m.
June 18: Iron Mountain trip, $10.
June 14: Dance, 6 p.m. to 9 p.m.; J. Jacobson, $5.
June 21: Pancake Day, 8 a.m.; to 11:30 a.m.; Adults, $5 and children under 12, $2.50.
Niagara Northwoods Senior Cafe and Center
Meal site Manager: Kathy Schutte (715) 251-1603
Center Director: Jill Anderson (715) 251-4154
Noon meals served Monday through Thursday.
Transportation to the meal site from the Niagara area is offered.
June 18: Father’s Day pork roast dinner with free bingo.
Director: Susie Slining
Monday through Thursday: Meals served at noon with salad bar. Soup is also available on Tuesdays and Thursdays
Cards daily before and after the noon meal.
Craft classes: Mondays and Thursdays, 7:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m.
Exercise classes: Monday and Thursday, 10 a.m. to 10:30 a.m. All welcome.
June 18: Blood pressure clinic, 11 a.m. to noon
June 20: Center dance from 7 p.m. to 10 p.m.; $5 at the door; music by 2X4; snacks, sweets and coffee will be provided.
June 24: Dinner, pork chops, bingo, prizes, and 50/50.
June 26: Birthday Club with meal of company chicken.
Director: Bette Christian
Meals: Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, 11:45 a.m.
Cards: Tuesday and Wednesday and Thursday.
Bingo every third Tuesday of the month.