Night before Christmas


It was the night before Christmas, at the cute little Schroeder abode. Remember it is that pretty gray house, out there off that country road.

After a big cup of spiked eggnog, and a large slice of Christmas cake. Don and Nat headed off to bed, with a nice long snooze at stake.

Nat in her soft warm flannel gown, she was quite snugly encased. While Don laid there wondering, was it another sleepless night he faced?

These new red flannels kept him warm, but they really make him itch like mad. How would he tell Nat, crossed his mind, she had made them and she would be sad.

Anyway about a brand new rifle, Don was soon off and dreaming. While through Nat’s pretty little head, a Hawaiian vacation she was scheming.

Suddenly a blast rattled their windows, it came from the trees in their backyard. It must be another darn old poacher, for which one must always be on guard.

Old Bubba Smith was there in their yard, trying to bag just one more nice fat deer. To him it didn’t matter the time or place, no animal was safe anytime of the year.

Brown and it had two eyes and four legs, no matter whether it was wild or tame. Bang. And it was soon in his truck, for to him they all tasted the same.

Now on this night nine brown animals, had just flown up onto Schroeder’s roof, now the average deer just can’t do that, of that we have quite definite proof.

Behind the nine deer was a big sleigh, and out stepped a rather old guy in red, when there was that very loud bang, and old Rudolf dropped over dead.

Now that dear old Santa was quite shook, of that I am sure it is needless to say. Someone popping off dear old Rudolf, that really did not make Santa’s day.

Santa dragged out Don’s brand new rifle, that was tucked deep down in his sack. Then dropped onto the roof in a prone, and stopped old Bubba right in his track.

Then Santa waved a double thumbs up, he said “that will handle that turkey.” Next he rolled Rudolf off of the roof, with a recipe on how to make jerky.

Santa went down through the chimney, with his special climbing spurs on. With a brand new computer for Nat, for Don a rifle with a barrel that’s octagon.

Santa fussed around their Christmas tree, where all the gifts were soon laid out. He munched up all those beer nuts, and drank down the English stout.

Then he was back up onto the roof, where he now had to let old Blitzen lead. For Rudolf would soon be back straps, because of Bubba’s dastardly deed.

Don and Nat now stood at their window, and heard Santa very loudly call out. Please catch those darn poachers, before the next Christmas season is about.

Don Schroeder

Niagara, Wis.